GIVE ANSWERS - 日本語

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Can anyone help me by proofreading a project im working on?

I am working on a paper for class, but the grammar and vocabulary are just a little too advanced for me. I think it sounds too fake and not native at all. Can anyone read over it and give me any corrections or suggestions to make it sound more native? I have the english version of what I want to say as well as the Japanese version.

PS: Find free Japanese learning lessons here: Free module: Adverb Types and Usage — Alphabet and Pronunciation — Places — Greetings