Corrections

Text from SJ42 - English

    • Essay about the ways of watching music concerts

    • Today, a very large part of the musical production is available online or on TV.
    • In this context, it can be difficult to understand why people keep on going to regional or local concerts whereas they could listen the best concerts of the world made by the greatest musicians and singers online.
    • Above all, the atmosphere of a concert is certainly the main aspect which can make attending to this event more worthwhile than listening remotely.
    • The excitation in the car and before the entrance of the artist on stage, the animation of the crowd, and the fact to share this moment with friends or family can make this experience full of emotions and much more memorable.
    • In addition, if someone is strongly interested by an artist’s music, he can appreciate more watching him sing or play a musical instrument in real life.
    • However, the upside to listen to a concert on TV or online is the larger amount of choices freely available without having to go outside.
    • Thus, it is an option more convenient for a person which wants to relax or would like to spend a quiet evening before going to sleep.
    • Moreover, concerts can also be regarded as events too much noisy and crowded by some people who do not appreciate this kind of atmosphere.
    • Accordingly, I think there is not any of these options better than the other.
    • Our preference depends on what we search for in listening a concert.
    • If our first aim is to share a nice experience with some friends the time of one evening, attending to the concert is certainly the best choice.
    • On the other hand, if someone prefers to listen to a concert in a quiet environment to unwind after having a long working day, the online option could be better to this person.

PLEASE, HELP TO CORRECT EACH SENTENCE! - English

  • Title
  • Sentence 1
  • Sentence 2
    • In this context, it can be difficult to understand why people keep on going to regional or local concerts whereas they could listen the best concerts of the world made by the greatest musicians and singers online.
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    • In this context, it can be difficult to understand why people keep on going to regional or local concerts whereasn they could listen to the best concerts ofin the world made by the greatest musicians and singers online.
    • ADD a NEW CORRECTION! - Sentence 2ADD a NEW CORRECTION! - Sentence 2
  • Sentence 3
    • Above all, the atmosphere of a concert is certainly the main aspect which can make attending to this event more worthwhile than listening remotely.
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    • Above all, the atmosphere of a concert is certainly the main aspect which can make attending to thissuch an event more worthwhile than listening remotely.
    • ADD a NEW CORRECTION! - Sentence 3ADD a NEW CORRECTION! - Sentence 3
  • Sentence 4
    • The excitation in the car and before the entrance of the artist on stage, the animation of the crowd, and the fact to share this moment with friends or family can make this experience full of emotions and much more memorable.
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    • The excitationement in the car and before the entrance of the artist on stage, the animation of the crowd, and the fact tof shareing this moment with friends or family can make this experience full of emotions and much more memorable.
    • ADD a NEW CORRECTION! - Sentence 4ADD a NEW CORRECTION! - Sentence 4
  • Sentence 5
    • In addition, if someone is strongly interested by an artist’s music, he can appreciate more watching him sing or play a musical instrument in real life.
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    • In addition, if someone is strongly interested byin an artist’s music, he can better appreciate more watching him sing or play a musical instrument in real life.
    • ADD a NEW CORRECTION! - Sentence 5ADD a NEW CORRECTION! - Sentence 5
  • Sentence 6
    • However, the upside to listen to a concert on TV or online is the larger amount of choices freely available without having to go outside.
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    • However, the upside to listening to a concert on TV or online is the larger amount of choices freely available without having to go outside.
    • ADD a NEW CORRECTION! - Sentence 6ADD a NEW CORRECTION! - Sentence 6
  • Sentence 7
    • Thus, it is an option more convenient for a person which wants to relax or would like to spend a quiet evening before going to sleep.
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    • Thus, it is an option more convenient option for a person whicho wants to relax or would like to spend a quiet evening before going to sleep.
    • Thus, it is an option more convenient option for a person whicho wants to relax or would like to spend a quiet evening before going to sleep.
    • ADD a NEW CORRECTION! - Sentence 7ADD a NEW CORRECTION! - Sentence 7
  • Sentence 8
    • Moreover, concerts can also be regarded as events too much noisy and crowded by some people who do not appreciate this kind of atmosphere.
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    • Moreover, concerts can also be regarded as events toohat are much too noisy and crowded by some people who do not appreciate this kind of atmosphere.
    • Moreover, concerts can also be regarded as events too muchbeing too noisy and crowded by some people who do not appreciate this kind of atmosphere.
    • ADD a NEW CORRECTION! - Sentence 8ADD a NEW CORRECTION! - Sentence 8
  • Sentence 9
  • Sentence 10
  • Sentence 11
    • If our first aim is to share a nice experience with some friends the time of one evening, attending to the concert is certainly the best choice.
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    • If our first aim is to share a nice experience with some friends the time of oneof an evening, attending to the concert is certainly the best choice.
    • If our first aim is to share a nice experiencevening with some friends the time of one evening,n attending to thea concert is certainly the best choice.
    • ADD a NEW CORRECTION! - Sentence 11ADD a NEW CORRECTION! - Sentence 11
  • Sentence 12
    • On the other hand, if someone prefers to listen to a concert in a quiet environment to unwind after having a long working day, the online option could be better to this person.
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    • On the other hand, if someone prefers to listen to a concert in a quiet environment to unwind after having a long working day, the online option could be better tofor this person. ¶
    • On the other hand, if someone prefers to listen to a concert in a quiet environment, to unwind after having a long working day, then the online option could be better tofor this person. ¶
    • ADD a NEW CORRECTION! - Sentence 12ADD a NEW CORRECTION! - Sentence 12