Corrections

Text from Juliya1235 - English

    • Pushing children to achieve robs them of their childhood

    • It is a common knowledge that bridging up children is a difficult task.
  • Some people think that parents should orient their children to achieve good results in different areas of activity, while others claim that children should enjoy their free time.
    • From my point of view, pushing children to achieve is not bad thing.
  • Firstly, I think that children should go to different clubs, and they should have some hobbies because it can develop their personality.
    • Secondly, achieving some results can give children self-confidence.
  • It can help them in their future because confident people are very successful.
    • Finally, if a child goes to some clubs, he will not have hardships when he will decide on his career.
    • However, some people believe that pushing children to achieve deprives they their childhood.
    • In their view, different clubs take a lot of time and children cannot play with their friends, go for a walk with them and live without no hardships.
  • However, I disagree with the above opinion.
    • I am convinced that taking part in different clubs teaches children time management.
    • Thanks to it, they can make their daily routine.
    • It gives them an opportunity to have working time and time for rest.
  • In conclusion, I believe that parents should give their children opportunities to develop as a person.

PLEASE, HELP TO CORRECT EACH SENTENCE! - English